Who the Hell is maadjurguer?

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I like to ski, mountain bike, drink beer, cook and listen to any jam band I can get my hands on; all while making a complete ass of myself. Hopefully this catharsis is as interesting to others as it is to me.

Monday, September 15, 2008

TUCK FEXAS!!!!

I'm hosting the 6th Annual Tuck Fexas celebration at my place again this year. Kickoff is at 900am....so the folks staying here will either not go to sleep the night before...or we'll be setting our alarm clocks to begin drinking. I've found a wonderful supplier of Texas Longhorn this year outside of Texas and have upped the ante with a new tenderizing technique bound to punch through that Texas stubbornness like a Sam Bradford passing attack. Please respond with your RSVP below by commenting to this post so I can start to get an accurate count of how many racks to buy. Some of you may be coming at halftime given the early start, if so; please indicate that in your reply. The menu for the day is listed below for those of you who have somehow forgotten from last year. To get the stoke up, here's the "Roy Williams kills UT" video from 01'.


Boomer Sooner!


Tuck Fexas Menu


Bevo – Certified Texas Longhorn Back Ribs: Organic, free-range, all grass-fed, no additives or preservatives from the RidgeRun ranch in Wagon Mound, New Mexico. I tenderize em’ (he’s already kinda soft, but I kick the shit out of’em for good measure), rubbed generously with my Tuck Fexas blend of spices and, smoke’em slow and low with Mesquite chips while surrounded by a bunch of jackass Sooners with nothing better to do than set their alarm clock so they can start drinkin’ before 7:00am.

Tuck Fexas Coleslaw - The usual, time-tested recipe with my Tuck Fexas blend of herbs and spices…ok, no herbs…just spices. Hell son, you gotta have something to chase that Bevo through your lower GI with. With all the beer, Bevo and Burbon you’re gonna consume this fine day, you need some greenery otherwise you’ll be swearin’ that Bevo hisself is poppin’ out your poop-hole.

Grilled Polenta – Polenta mixed with freshly roasted Hatch green chiles, aged cheddar and fresh grilled corn, grilled and served in wedges. I know what you’re thinking, Polenta? It sounds like one of those Texas Tech-“Harvard on the Plains” fancy-nancy recipes that’ll have you dancin’ round like Graham Harrell without an open receiver. It's fancy allright, but believe me, this is the real deal.

Pecan Pie – My Grandma Jewel’s recipe complete with the attitude her Cherokee 1,000 yard stare warranted. If you don’t know what goes into a pecan pie, don't bother asking; your pancreas will remind you later. I, of course, will only use Oklahoma grown Pecans.

Beer – Lots of it. If you don’t know what this is; I believe Cornell is playing at Harvard during the OU game and suggest you go watch that instead. How you deconfict that with the scheduling nightmare that is Yale at Dartmouth AND the Cornell-Harvard game is your problem, not mine.

9 comments:

Unknown said...

I really hate those Austin kids, effing snobs.

I will either be at the game or, in the alternative, at Gaylord Family stadium west in Mesa, AZ.

Hot Rod

PS, great blog!

Anonymous said...

Nice....and congrats on being the 1st person to comment on my blog. May your camels be numerous and your wives bring you plenty of sons.

MaadJurguer

Anonymous said...

Fuc...I mean...Tuck ya, I'll be there, with the better half. Let's see, OU footbal shirt, check; Boomer Sooner shoes, check; hat that hasn't been washed since...well..let's not get into that.

Nice blog, by the way.

Anonymous said...

Who knew you had such a way with words. I love how you can be a asshole and at the same time also be condescending, geat blog.

The menu looks good, I would just make sure that all of your orders are shipped via states west of fexas, otherwise they could possibly be tainted by mad cow or some other disease which has gone airborne in fexas.

Anonymous said...

Also, I never get tired of watching that video. Pure magic every time.

Anonymous said...

Nice to see you all fired up! We will also be doing friday night at Joe's for a little warm up...hopefully our waitress is not a texas fan like last year...I actully felt sorry for her, what with linz's shirt calling her a slut and all that....well, almost felt sorry for her! As to Justin's comment regarding shipping points on Bevo, i made sure that the meat starts west of texas, never passes through texas and travels straight here. No processing in texas, no packaging in texas, no sales in texas......

Anonymous said...

Hell Ya we will be there. Save a bedroom! We will be bringing some interesting Sooner Stuff as well!
SEE YA THEN!!!!

Anonymous said...

Hey, for those of you who haven't seen the treasure of a t-shirt referenced above, you're in for a real treat!

Also sweetie, you didn't mention the orange Bevo pinata we'll be breaking out at half-time, with a special prize reserved for the guest who takes it down. Still TBD, however: the sacrificial burning of it in our front yard.

...juuust an idea :-)

Anonymous said...

Looking forward to it (while Doug slaves away on the soccer field...poor guy misses all the fun!); but alas, I think you can count me out of partaking in the Bevo eating and the Bevo beating. I'll stick to my tofu strips so early in the morning! :) See you Soon-er!!!

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